A Cartoonish Life

Like a fool, I actually watched that two-night "Kim's Fairytale Wedding" crap that E! aired only three weeks ago. Now let me get out of the way that I don't obsessively follow "Keeping Up With the Kardashians." I watch the show when it's airing in constant repeats during the day (because E! likes to marathon the crap out of that show) and there's nothing else to watch. And somehow I know about their business because E! just won't quit riding that cash pony. They're kind of in my face when I don't want them to, and I ask myself, "Why do I even know about this?!"

But like I said, yeah, I watched "Kim's Fairytale Wedding." Purely for laughs. And there were plenty. ( It gets kind of TL;DR. Basically, Kim is not a dog person, K-Humph called her out on her BS, I laughed my ass off and was honestly not surprised. )

That's what pisses me off the most about this. It's not necessarily the fact that she did indeed make cash off of this (which she is blatantly denying). I just feel that she didn't even try. Kris Humphries wasn't going to kiss her ass like everyone else does, and he certainly didn't want to end up like Bruce Jenner and Scott Disick, with his balls in his wife's enormous Hermes handbag.

....Just sayin'.

You know, I'm not laughing over it because it's not something to be laughed at. She's been giving so many second chances, and she's violated her probation and tried making excuses for it, and has tried to break it...and now this. It's about time something like this happens to Lindsay Lohan. She needs to fucking grow up and start taking responsibility for her actions, and quit acting like the world's out to get her and her dad's always trying to set her up.

I'm not even going to waste the laughs on her and attempt to mock her. Just go the hell to jail and learn a lesson from all of this, Lindsay.

Warm, wet and wild, there must be something in the water...

LOL, this is ridiculous! I'm not saying I don't like it. As a matter of fact, I do. It's just....*giggles*! How on Earth does Candyland have ANYTHING to do with the lyrics?! Is she implying that being a California Gurl is the equivalent to being in Candyland?

(Actually, it reminds me of what Doe Deere is trying to do with her Candy-Future thing, but Katy pulls it off much better. THE COLORS, DUKE! THE COLORS!!)

Saturday night was fucking AWESOME!!!!!!! My legs are still sore! *hee hee*

GOD, I wish I had pictures. But for one thing, I don't want pictures taken of me in the floorshow corset now, because I'm flabby and soooo not in shape to be wearing that thing. For another thing, how am I going to take pix when I'm on stage? :P

Highlight of the night was the reel going out during dinner scene. We ALL started just started reciting the lines and singing "Eddie" anyway. Then after "Planet Schmanet" and running around the theater, the movie was loaded back in. Then we had to do it alllll again.

But boy. Like I said, I really need to get back into shape.

Especially since I'll be doing this again on June 11th. :D

Who knows? I may be back to doing Rocky Horror on a semi-regular basis. I had a lot of fun, and it'll be interesting in getting newbies to start coming to the show. And I truly had forgotten just how much fun I had doing this when I started doing it at the Crossroads. Being on a stage is a rush in itself.

It's just too bad Fester wasn't around to see it. *sigh*

*tangent* Who else watched the footage of Lindsay Lohan's day in court? WOW, that judge didn't want to let her off easy. I especially loved when Lindsay's lawyer tried telling the doctor that she skipped one of her alcohol education meetings because of a death in the family, and the judge asking Lindsay if she actually went to the funeral, and Lindsay had to convene with her lawyer who finally answered, "No."

Ooh, ooh, and I love how the lawyer tried talking the judge into letting Lindsay just take the remainder of her classes in one week to get them out of the way. Once again, the judge put her foot down and said, "No." Oh, and I especially loved how the lawyer tried explaining how Lindsay had a bunch of scheduled photoshoots and her upcoming movie in Texas that her SCRAM bracelet would interfere with, and could she just go to her mandatory random drug testing down in Texas? Once again, "No."

How the hell would her SCRAM ankle bracelet interfere with her photoshoots? Just shoot her from the waist up. Take her SCRAM bracelet out in Photoshop. And just how would her SCRAM bracelet interfere with filming that Linda Lovelace movie? Afraid she doesn't want it showing in leg shots? Get a fucking body double. It's not hard. You can work around this shit. And really, after this incident, wouldn't the producers of this Linda Lovelace project think that Lindsay Lohan is a LIABILITY on a movie set and--once again--UNINSURABLE?!

"You know what really grinds my gears? This Lindsay Lohan. Lindsay Lohan with all those little outfits, jumping around there on stage, half-naked with your little outfits. Ya know? You're a... You're out there jumping around and I'm just sitting here with my beer. So, what am I supposed to do? What you want? You know, are we gonna go out? Is that what you're trying to - why why are you leaping around there, throwing those things all up in my, over there in my face? What do you want, Lindsay? Tell me what you want? Well, I'll tell you what you want, you want nothing. You want nothing. All right? Because we all know that no woman anywhere wants to have sex with anyone, and to titillate us with any thoughts otherwise is - is just bogus."

Kate came out swinging on "Today" this morning, slamming Jon for clearing $230,000 out of the couple's joint bank account: "You've left your children and their mother unable to pay for the roof over their head. It's unacceptable."

As for Jon's claim the children don't want to do the show anymore, Kate says there was "wailing and sobbing" when she broke the news to 'em that filming has halted.

As TMZ previously reported, Kate's lawyers are going to court today to demand the return of the cash and a contempt citation against Jon. Stay tuned ...

**************

Kate Gosselin just doesn't get it. If you don't have a real job of your own and you can't provide for your kids (let's be honest; being a single mother and having eight children doesn't leave you enough time to search for and hold down a full-time job) and the baby-daddy is a douchebag and won't hold down his end of the deal, you don't air your dirty laundry out on TV and exploit the kids' cuteness-factor on TV. You collect welfare and go on food stamps! That's the American way!

Shit, single parents on welfare/food stamps is a reality show in its own merit. MTV should do a "True Life" episode on it.

And I hate to say it, but does anyone know how Nadya Suleman's holding up these days with her fourteen chillins?

Beyoncé's (aka "Sasha Boring") latest piece o' crap:



Too bad the song's kind of cool, because this video is BORING.

And now, Britney's:



I think I'm one of the few people that actually like it. It's different for her. I think it's getting bad reception from her fans because it's not what she'd normally do; it's not "shake my ass, flip my hair and do some half-assed arm-dancing, my fans will go nuts anyway." My only problem is that A) it's kind of boring, and B) it seems like a four-minute ad for her Candies clothing line promotion.


But seriously? I think I know why I'm so underwhelmed with these. This is what else I've been watching for the last couple of weeks:( Read more... )


Can you understand WHY I'm just not thrilled with Britney and Beyoncé currently?

We're never going to have anyone remotely close to being as amazing as Michael was. He went out on the top, as far as I'm concerned.




......I'm gonna curl up in my sock drawer and sleep for days.

The King of Pop is dead.

Kevin called me with the news like as soon as I went on break at work.

I don't even know what to say. I imagine for me, this is like the equivalent of Elvis Presley's death. We've lost one of the greats, if not, THE greatest. And I take great pride in the fact that he and his brothers grew up around here in Northwest Indiana. I can't even think of any current music artist now who could even take his place. Michael Jackson and Madonna were the big music icons of my generation, and he will sorely be missed.





*edited* I would also like to add this. For all of you who didn't get to grow up in the 80s....you missed out. You missed out on the era when MTV was new and fresh and Michael Jackson and Madonna reigned supreme. I remember seeing Michael debut the Moonwalk on the Motown anniversary celebration, I remember Thriller on MTV, I remember seeing Captain EO in 3D at Walt Disney World, I remember all the fuss when his hair caught on fire when he did the Pepsi commercial. Seriously, all of you young 'uns who grew up on Britney and *NSYNC...you missed out.

"Megan Wants A Millionaire"



Yeah, remember that skanky bitch from "Rock of Love" and "Charm School" that I ended up hating more than Lacey? Here's the premise for her piece of shit show that I'll probably end up watching and snarking on for your enjoyment:

"Megan’s millionaire suitors will compete in challenges ranging from going head to head in a high roller Las Vegas tournament to shelling out money in a date auction. Whoever wins the challenge, will win a date with Megan. But, it won’t just be any date. The millionaires will be given the chance to “upgrade” their date. How about driving Megan to dinner in an Aston Martin, instead of an Escalade? Or why not take a helicopter ride to Catalina Island instead of the ferry? One by one, Megan will eliminate the guys who can’t shell out the dough, until the ultimate millionaire is left."

Seriously, who would want to spend money to take this heinous, self-absorbed tramp out? What is this teaching us? That the only way to this fame-whore's heart is if you have cash? It reeks of...well, prostitution, to be honest. And I can't imagine this will bring in much in the ratings department for Vh1.

Take a cue from J.Lo, honey:

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Every once in a while on ohnotheydidnt, a user will make a quote that just stands out so true and sums up the thread the best that I will give them the "QUOTE OF THE DAY!" gold star:



None of them really stand out for me, but I should probably start keeping track and posting them on here. ;)