Christmas....bah, humbug
Dec. 23rd, 2007 10:29 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
hollybrookeChristmas this year has just made me feel bad and terrible. It's made me feel this way because I haven't had the money to get the Christmas shopping I wanted to get done for my friends and family. I haven't even been able to afford Christmas cards to send, that's how poor I've been. All of my money's been put into my car, with the gas and the payments. I keep working stupid hours at work, and my paychecks are really crummy.
The other day I got what I could call my "Christmas bonus," and I wasn't thrilled. I got a $10 gift certificate to our store. I'm sorry, but when a company feels the need to reward you with a holiday bonus like a gift card or gift certificate to the place where you work, that's just lame. I just bought a sandwich from the deli for a buck and some change with it and put the remainder in my gas tank. That's all my job is good for, giving me money to put into my gas tank to ensure that I can continue to make it to the job to keep working for not enough pay.
You know, I haven't been feeling too hot about where I am now in my life because I feel like I have nothing big going for me. I'm still stuck in B-F, Egypt. I'm working a dead-end job; not my old one, but an entirely different one that I hate about as much. I'm still trying to finish up college. I have no boyfriend. I feel bad because I really haven't been in touch with any of my friends because I don't want to hear about how great things have been for them while I have absolutely nothing new to report. Everyone's either getting married or having babies or starting a great exciting career of their own, and here I am with absolutely nothing to show for the last few years of my life. I feel like I've done nothing but waste my time. I thought things would be getting better, but they aren't. I feel like I don't have much to be thankful for this year at all, other than I'm still alive and taking each day as it comes and I'm lucky my parents haven't kicked me out of the house yet.
So to everyone out there...I really wish I could muster up the Christmas spirit this year, but it ain't happening. I'm sorry. Maybe in a week or so, I'll be having a better year and you can get old, fun, happy Holly back.
The other day I got what I could call my "Christmas bonus," and I wasn't thrilled. I got a $10 gift certificate to our store. I'm sorry, but when a company feels the need to reward you with a holiday bonus like a gift card or gift certificate to the place where you work, that's just lame. I just bought a sandwich from the deli for a buck and some change with it and put the remainder in my gas tank. That's all my job is good for, giving me money to put into my gas tank to ensure that I can continue to make it to the job to keep working for not enough pay.
You know, I haven't been feeling too hot about where I am now in my life because I feel like I have nothing big going for me. I'm still stuck in B-F, Egypt. I'm working a dead-end job; not my old one, but an entirely different one that I hate about as much. I'm still trying to finish up college. I have no boyfriend. I feel bad because I really haven't been in touch with any of my friends because I don't want to hear about how great things have been for them while I have absolutely nothing new to report. Everyone's either getting married or having babies or starting a great exciting career of their own, and here I am with absolutely nothing to show for the last few years of my life. I feel like I've done nothing but waste my time. I thought things would be getting better, but they aren't. I feel like I don't have much to be thankful for this year at all, other than I'm still alive and taking each day as it comes and I'm lucky my parents haven't kicked me out of the house yet.
So to everyone out there...I really wish I could muster up the Christmas spirit this year, but it ain't happening. I'm sorry. Maybe in a week or so, I'll be having a better year and you can get old, fun, happy Holly back.
