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hollybrookeThe Baby-Sitters Club Special Christmas!
(I will also be cross-posting this to![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
bsc_snark. YES, I know, I still have to finish up "Dawn and Too Many Sitters," but this is a part of my Christmas snark series, so I'm going to share with other BSC fans.)
"Say hello to your friends!" Oh gawd, the theme song. The cheese-tastic theme song. I forgot how much that theme song made me inwardly cringe just to have liked the BSC when I was a tween/teenager. But our girls are window shopping and doing their BFF-shenanigans inside Washington Mall. Jessi's day-glo jacket reminds me of a similar jacket I had when I was eleven. And I would've killed for curly permed hair like Stacey's when I was that age. But no. My hair is thick and stick-straight and barely holds curl without coating it in two cans' worth of Aqua Net.
1:09 They all sit on Santa's lap. I wonder how Santa feels having all of those teenage girls sitting on his lap. What the BSC doesn't know is that he's a registered sex offender.
So Dawn and Claud are perusing the tacky jewelry racks. Raise your hand if you ever wore jewelry like that in the early 90s.
And who is Claudia kidding? Dawn would never wear anything like that. Neither would Janine. If it were made of recycled milk jugs, though, Dawn might consider it.
1:50 Dawn, why do you even bother wanting Kristy's opinion? She's a tomboy. She don't go for girly crap like that.
Stacey wants to get a nightie for her mom, but she's worried about how much money it costs. (Just go hit up your rich daddy, Stace. But leave out the part that it's for your mom.) And Kristy is worried about the price of a baseball mitt. So she asks the salesman to hold it for her while she asks her mom about it first. It's the last one, so if I were Kristy, I wouldn't be surprised if the salesman sells it to someone who has the money up front.
Back at Claudia's house, the girls are having a BSC meeting (I guess; why else would they be in Claud's room?) and planning some BSC project for sick kids in the hospital. What philanthropists these girls are! Claud's going on and on about Christmas cookies and candy, but Stacey the Diabetic points out that kids in the hospital really can't eat all that stuff. (That's Claudia for you, always thinking with her stomach.) After a couple crappy suggestions from Jessi and Mal, Stacey comes up with the great idea that they raid her mom's attic (and others) for old clothes to make a dress-up box. HOW DARE YOU, STACEY MCGILL?! KRISTY THOMAS IS THE ONLY PURVEYOR OF GREAT IDEAS!! And then Claud suggests that they make stuff with popsicle sticks to give to their parents.
The Mrs. Rodowsky calls and needs two sitters. One for Jackie and Archie, and one for Shea while he's practicing piano. Isn't the rule two sitters only if there four or more kids? But I guess they make the exception for the Rodowskys because Jackie is a handful on his own. Stacey and Dawn take the job, and Kristy asks Mrs. R if it's okay if they bake cookies. Yeah, she's already pawning off responsibilities for the hospital party on her minions. (But knowing Dawn, she'll want to make healthy shit like oatmeal berry flax cookies.)
New club business: they can't afford the hospital shindig and one of their own. Or to go out shopping for each member of the club. So Mary Anne suggests doing a Secret Santa thing. Which is all well and good, but Claudia thinks it's a bad idea because no one in the club knows how to keep a secret. They draw names out of the hat, and Kristy jokes around about who she picked. Bad acting and forced laughing ensue. End scene.
Back at the Thomas-Brewer Estate, Kristy is helping her mom decorate for Christmas. Kristy brings up the mitt that she has on hold at the mall. Her mom freaks at the price of it, and points out that Kristy already has three baseball mitts. Kristy's all, "ButKaren has a lot of dolls and you got her a fancy porcelain one." Wow, way to be mature, Kristy. Mrs. Brewer calls Kristy out on snooping around for Christmas presents. (Oops.) So Mrs. Brewer strikes up a deal with Kristy that if she's willing to work and pay for half of it, she'll take care of the rest. Then it's not REALLY a present if you're paying for half of it. Whatever.
At the Rodowskys, Stacey is sitting with Shea while he practices piano. And none of them know how to sing worth a crap. My ears are bleeding. Jackie is being a pain in the ass with his "laughing all the way." Dawn comes out with freshly baked sugar cookies. Well, they look like sugar cookies. But knowing Dawn, she turned up her vegetarian, no-sugar-loving nose while making them. Then she practically shoves the plate of cookies under Diabetic Stacey's nose.
Stacey takes them to the kitchen so there are some left for the party while the other Rodowskys beat the shit out of the piano. And in the kitchen.....Stacey sneaks a cookie. Now we all know what happens if Stacey eats so much as a tiny M&M: SHE'LL DIE!! (Why do I have a feeling the BSC is going to be bringing the Christmas party to Stacey in the hospital by the end of this video?) Dawn catches her and chews her out for it. Jackie wants to know why Stacey can't eat cookies, so she briefly explains her diabetes to him (like every other person in the 'Brook doesn't know STACEY MGCILL HAS THE DIABEETUS!). Dawn points out that it seems like Stacey's been eating quite a few sweets lately. Stacey's all, "What? Are you keeping track?" Yes, Dawn the Health Food Queen HAS been keeping track, thankyouverymuch. But only because she's a good friend.
Back at Stately Brewer Manor, Kristy's organizing and cleaning out her mom's closet. (Hey, everyone. Kristy's in the closet!) Mrs. Brewer is surprised at some of the stuff Kristy's found and wants to throw out, but Kristy says that Stacey says that if you never wear it in over a year, then you should throw it out. Well then, over half of my closet needs to go! Then Kristy is about to throw out her mom's wedding dress. Mrs. Brewer is all, "Watson would be upset if I got rid of this!" and tells Kristy to go clean out her own closet. (Cue another cheap "Kristy's still in the closet" joke.)
At the Stoneybrook General Hospital, the girls are decorating for the party. Mal and Jessi--the youngest girls in the group--are stuck with the unpleasant task of hauling around the live tree. These girls wanted to get a real tree for this gig? Dang, I'd think the most they could afford would be a pathetic Charlie Brown twig of a tree:
(BTW, I actually have a tree like this.)
Claud asks Dawn if she's making her banana cake, and tells her to cover it in chocolate sauce because she likes her junk food to be...well, junky. Stacey tells them to quit talking about food; she's got a stomach ache. GEE, I WONDER WHY! Dawn chides Stacey for sneaking in sweets. Stacey's all, "You're not my mom, get off my back!" Dawn tells her she just worries when people don't take care of themselves. Stacey says, "Don't you think Stacey and Claudia go off so she can buy some Mallowmars from Claudia off the black market.
Then some boy in a wheelchair with a broken leg wheels into the room, sees the girls decorating and is all, "Ick, nast, GIRLS." His name is Ned, and he's "not into Kristy asks how he broke his leg, and he got tackled by two boys twice his size playing ice ball, a combo of stickball, football and hockey. (EXTREME SPORTS!) Turns out this kid loves baseball as much as Kristy does, but after his injury he doesn't know if he'll get to play anymore. And then they talk about that mitt Kristy's getting for Christmas. Stacey comes back after getting her Mallomar high and tells Ned he's got a call from his mom. Turns out she's not coming to the hospital. Somehow, Ned's not surprised. He sadly wheels out of the room. Stacey explains that both of his parents work and neither one of them have a car. Looks like victims of the recession. So now Kristy feels guilty about getting that expensive mitt.
Back at Stately Brewer Manor, Kristy has taken on the role of Cinderella so Watson doesn't have to hire a maid. Just so she can get her mitts on that mitt. *ha*
Meanwhile, Stacey's babysitting Charlotte Johansen, and Charlotte's playing with her stuffed animals under the Christmas tree. Stacey looks like she's not feeling well. (Maybe because she just realized that tight-rolling her jeans is out of style.) So instead of Stacey reading to Charlotte, Charlotte reads to her. Uh-oh....
Out and about in the 'Brook, Claudia goes shopping for her Secret Santa gift at a department store. She goes to look in the perfume department, and then Mary Anne shows up doing her shopping. Don't tell me Claudia drew Mary Anne's name in the Secret Santa! Then Jessi shows up doing her Secret Santa shopping. Then Dawn shows up doing....I'm sure you can guess. And is it really necessary for them to tell the sales lady that they're "doing their Secret Santa shopping"? Claudia looks like a total goof with an eyemask and a shower cap on, traipsing throughout the store. And then they all bump into each other and giggle.
Later on, at the Rainbow Corner diner, they exchange their presents over lunch. Kristy wants to know why their dessert is taking so long. Stacey starts chugging her water like she's a freaking camel. Then their dessert arrives. It looks like those cheap little Little Debbie brownies that come pre-packaged, but arranged on a pretty platter. And they went to a DINER for this? Then Stacey commits a carnal sin and......eats one of the brownies. Water and brownies. YUM YUM.
That night, while Jessi reads "The Night Before Christmas" to Becca, we get a BSC Chrismas montage of the girls with their families. Mal putting up allllllll of the Pike kids' stockings. Kristy gets her damn mitt. (Where are Sam and Charlie and David Michael?! Or Watson or Karen or Andrew?!) Claud is eating "Santa's cookies." Dawn and Mary Anne brave the cold to open the window at their place. In their nighties. Yet all is not well in the McGill household, because Stacey's diabeetus is acting up.
The next day, the girls are waiting at the hospital for the party. Kristy brought her mitt with her, which she doesn't need at the party. They all show up...except for Stacey. And they wonder just where she is. (They haven't put two and two together yet? They've seen her sneaking the sweets. How clueless are they?) Dr. Johansen stops them and tells the girls Stacey's in room 522. "She went ahead without us?!" No, dummies. She's in the hospital for REAL. So they go up to visit her. She didn't tell them because she's sick of being sick and doesn't want anyone to worry about her. THEN DON'T SNEAK IN SWEETS WHEN YOU KNOW YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO. Sometimes Dawn's nagging means good, you know.
Then it's Christmastime at the hospital! (Which I know is where I want to voluntarily be on Christmas.) Jackie Rodowsky plays Santa, and Charlotte goes up to give him a kiss under the mistletoe. Yeeech. Ned the broken leg kid looks on, looking sad and lonely. He gets a lousy snowglobe. So Kristy decides to gives Ned her expensive mitt, because he probably deserves it more. (And she's got THREE MORE at home.)
Then Stacey the party girl comes down from her room and NOW the party can start.
"WE WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS
WE WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS
WE WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS
AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR!"
Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good snark!
(I will also be cross-posting this to
bsc_snark. YES, I know, I still have to finish up "Dawn and Too Many Sitters," but this is a part of my Christmas snark series, so I'm going to share with other BSC fans.)"Say hello to your friends!" Oh gawd, the theme song. The cheese-tastic theme song. I forgot how much that theme song made me inwardly cringe just to have liked the BSC when I was a tween/teenager. But our girls are window shopping and doing their BFF-shenanigans inside Washington Mall. Jessi's day-glo jacket reminds me of a similar jacket I had when I was eleven. And I would've killed for curly permed hair like Stacey's when I was that age. But no. My hair is thick and stick-straight and barely holds curl without coating it in two cans' worth of Aqua Net.
1:09 They all sit on Santa's lap. I wonder how Santa feels having all of those teenage girls sitting on his lap. What the BSC doesn't know is that he's a registered sex offender.
So Dawn and Claud are perusing the tacky jewelry racks. Raise your hand if you ever wore jewelry like that in the early 90s.
And who is Claudia kidding? Dawn would never wear anything like that. Neither would Janine. If it were made of recycled milk jugs, though, Dawn might consider it.
1:50 Dawn, why do you even bother wanting Kristy's opinion? She's a tomboy. She don't go for girly crap like that.
Stacey wants to get a nightie for her mom, but she's worried about how much money it costs. (Just go hit up your rich daddy, Stace. But leave out the part that it's for your mom.) And Kristy is worried about the price of a baseball mitt. So she asks the salesman to hold it for her while she asks her mom about it first. It's the last one, so if I were Kristy, I wouldn't be surprised if the salesman sells it to someone who has the money up front.
Back at Claudia's house, the girls are having a BSC meeting (I guess; why else would they be in Claud's room?) and planning some BSC project for sick kids in the hospital. What philanthropists these girls are! Claud's going on and on about Christmas cookies and candy, but Stacey the Diabetic points out that kids in the hospital really can't eat all that stuff. (That's Claudia for you, always thinking with her stomach.) After a couple crappy suggestions from Jessi and Mal, Stacey comes up with the great idea that they raid her mom's attic (and others) for old clothes to make a dress-up box. HOW DARE YOU, STACEY MCGILL?! KRISTY THOMAS IS THE ONLY PURVEYOR OF GREAT IDEAS!! And then Claud suggests that they make stuff with popsicle sticks to give to their parents.
The Mrs. Rodowsky calls and needs two sitters. One for Jackie and Archie, and one for Shea while he's practicing piano. Isn't the rule two sitters only if there four or more kids? But I guess they make the exception for the Rodowskys because Jackie is a handful on his own. Stacey and Dawn take the job, and Kristy asks Mrs. R if it's okay if they bake cookies. Yeah, she's already pawning off responsibilities for the hospital party on her minions. (But knowing Dawn, she'll want to make healthy shit like oatmeal berry flax cookies.)
New club business: they can't afford the hospital shindig and one of their own. Or to go out shopping for each member of the club. So Mary Anne suggests doing a Secret Santa thing. Which is all well and good, but Claudia thinks it's a bad idea because no one in the club knows how to keep a secret. They draw names out of the hat, and Kristy jokes around about who she picked. Bad acting and forced laughing ensue. End scene.
Back at the Thomas-Brewer Estate, Kristy is helping her mom decorate for Christmas. Kristy brings up the mitt that she has on hold at the mall. Her mom freaks at the price of it, and points out that Kristy already has three baseball mitts. Kristy's all, "ButKaren has a lot of dolls and you got her a fancy porcelain one." Wow, way to be mature, Kristy. Mrs. Brewer calls Kristy out on snooping around for Christmas presents. (Oops.) So Mrs. Brewer strikes up a deal with Kristy that if she's willing to work and pay for half of it, she'll take care of the rest. Then it's not REALLY a present if you're paying for half of it. Whatever.
At the Rodowskys, Stacey is sitting with Shea while he practices piano. And none of them know how to sing worth a crap. My ears are bleeding. Jackie is being a pain in the ass with his "laughing all the way." Dawn comes out with freshly baked sugar cookies. Well, they look like sugar cookies. But knowing Dawn, she turned up her vegetarian, no-sugar-loving nose while making them. Then she practically shoves the plate of cookies under Diabetic Stacey's nose.
Stacey takes them to the kitchen so there are some left for the party while the other Rodowskys beat the shit out of the piano. And in the kitchen.....Stacey sneaks a cookie. Now we all know what happens if Stacey eats so much as a tiny M&M: SHE'LL DIE!! (Why do I have a feeling the BSC is going to be bringing the Christmas party to Stacey in the hospital by the end of this video?) Dawn catches her and chews her out for it. Jackie wants to know why Stacey can't eat cookies, so she briefly explains her diabetes to him (like every other person in the 'Brook doesn't know STACEY MGCILL HAS THE DIABEETUS!). Dawn points out that it seems like Stacey's been eating quite a few sweets lately. Stacey's all, "What? Are you keeping track?" Yes, Dawn the Health Food Queen HAS been keeping track, thankyouverymuch. But only because she's a good friend.
Back at Stately Brewer Manor, Kristy's organizing and cleaning out her mom's closet. (Hey, everyone. Kristy's in the closet!) Mrs. Brewer is surprised at some of the stuff Kristy's found and wants to throw out, but Kristy says that Stacey says that if you never wear it in over a year, then you should throw it out. Well then, over half of my closet needs to go! Then Kristy is about to throw out her mom's wedding dress. Mrs. Brewer is all, "Watson would be upset if I got rid of this!" and tells Kristy to go clean out her own closet. (Cue another cheap "Kristy's still in the closet" joke.)
At the Stoneybrook General Hospital, the girls are decorating for the party. Mal and Jessi--the youngest girls in the group--are stuck with the unpleasant task of hauling around the live tree. These girls wanted to get a real tree for this gig? Dang, I'd think the most they could afford would be a pathetic Charlie Brown twig of a tree:
(BTW, I actually have a tree like this.)
Claud asks Dawn if she's making her banana cake, and tells her to cover it in chocolate sauce because she likes her junk food to be...well, junky. Stacey tells them to quit talking about food; she's got a stomach ache. GEE, I WONDER WHY! Dawn chides Stacey for sneaking in sweets. Stacey's all, "You're not my mom, get off my back!" Dawn tells her she just worries when people don't take care of themselves. Stacey says, "Don't you think Stacey and Claudia go off so she can buy some Mallowmars from Claudia off the black market.
Then some boy in a wheelchair with a broken leg wheels into the room, sees the girls decorating and is all, "Ick, nast, GIRLS." His name is Ned, and he's "not into Kristy asks how he broke his leg, and he got tackled by two boys twice his size playing ice ball, a combo of stickball, football and hockey. (EXTREME SPORTS!) Turns out this kid loves baseball as much as Kristy does, but after his injury he doesn't know if he'll get to play anymore. And then they talk about that mitt Kristy's getting for Christmas. Stacey comes back after getting her Mallomar high and tells Ned he's got a call from his mom. Turns out she's not coming to the hospital. Somehow, Ned's not surprised. He sadly wheels out of the room. Stacey explains that both of his parents work and neither one of them have a car. Looks like victims of the recession. So now Kristy feels guilty about getting that expensive mitt.
Back at Stately Brewer Manor, Kristy has taken on the role of Cinderella so Watson doesn't have to hire a maid. Just so she can get her mitts on that mitt. *ha*
Meanwhile, Stacey's babysitting Charlotte Johansen, and Charlotte's playing with her stuffed animals under the Christmas tree. Stacey looks like she's not feeling well. (Maybe because she just realized that tight-rolling her jeans is out of style.) So instead of Stacey reading to Charlotte, Charlotte reads to her. Uh-oh....
Out and about in the 'Brook, Claudia goes shopping for her Secret Santa gift at a department store. She goes to look in the perfume department, and then Mary Anne shows up doing her shopping. Don't tell me Claudia drew Mary Anne's name in the Secret Santa! Then Jessi shows up doing her Secret Santa shopping. Then Dawn shows up doing....I'm sure you can guess. And is it really necessary for them to tell the sales lady that they're "doing their Secret Santa shopping"? Claudia looks like a total goof with an eyemask and a shower cap on, traipsing throughout the store. And then they all bump into each other and giggle.
Later on, at the Rainbow Corner diner, they exchange their presents over lunch. Kristy wants to know why their dessert is taking so long. Stacey starts chugging her water like she's a freaking camel. Then their dessert arrives. It looks like those cheap little Little Debbie brownies that come pre-packaged, but arranged on a pretty platter. And they went to a DINER for this? Then Stacey commits a carnal sin and......eats one of the brownies. Water and brownies. YUM YUM.
That night, while Jessi reads "The Night Before Christmas" to Becca, we get a BSC Chrismas montage of the girls with their families. Mal putting up allllllll of the Pike kids' stockings. Kristy gets her damn mitt. (Where are Sam and Charlie and David Michael?! Or Watson or Karen or Andrew?!) Claud is eating "Santa's cookies." Dawn and Mary Anne brave the cold to open the window at their place. In their nighties. Yet all is not well in the McGill household, because Stacey's diabeetus is acting up.
The next day, the girls are waiting at the hospital for the party. Kristy brought her mitt with her, which she doesn't need at the party. They all show up...except for Stacey. And they wonder just where she is. (They haven't put two and two together yet? They've seen her sneaking the sweets. How clueless are they?) Dr. Johansen stops them and tells the girls Stacey's in room 522. "She went ahead without us?!" No, dummies. She's in the hospital for REAL. So they go up to visit her. She didn't tell them because she's sick of being sick and doesn't want anyone to worry about her. THEN DON'T SNEAK IN SWEETS WHEN YOU KNOW YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO. Sometimes Dawn's nagging means good, you know.
Then it's Christmastime at the hospital! (Which I know is where I want to voluntarily be on Christmas.) Jackie Rodowsky plays Santa, and Charlotte goes up to give him a kiss under the mistletoe. Yeeech. Ned the broken leg kid looks on, looking sad and lonely. He gets a lousy snowglobe. So Kristy decides to gives Ned her expensive mitt, because he probably deserves it more. (And she's got THREE MORE at home.)
Then Stacey the party girl comes down from her room and NOW the party can start.
"WE WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS
WE WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS
WE WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS
AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR!"
Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good snark!
