I can use the "Holly does something stupid" tag

So yesterday, I was chewing a piece of gum. And I bit down hard on my freaking tongue, for crying out loud.

This morning I was brushing my teeth and got a good look at my tongue. It's bruised! I didn't think that sort of thing could happen! But it's kind of gross. It still hurts, and it looks like I have tongue cancer or something. (And tongue cancer is very real; my dentist does a check for it whenever I have a check-up.) It's just....wow. Who'd have thought someone could actually do something like that?